
Yesterday morning at a London private event, a wispy-haired balding banker in his mid-fifties siddles up to me while I am talking to the event host, they know each other, and he inquires what I do. As the event host excuses herself, I briefly explain the improved conditions I create for my entrepreneur, investor and ultra high net worth clients. He immediately pivots the conversation, whlle handing me his business card into his latest tech-driven dealflow, inquires of my UHNWs clients interest in receiving various investor decks etc., and effuses about my potential value to him, “broadening my distribution amongst less obvious investors”. He then jokes about his guests waiting for him at their nearby lunch destination, and runs to the exit.
He is a guest at the small intimate event of a highly-valued private banking friend – top tier track record – so I don’t dismiss his credibility. However, why would I make him my priority if he very obviously has nothing more to offer than a transaction not a relationship?
A second guest, an investor, arrives shortly after we talk about family, where we have lived, sports, and contemporary matters. He is engaging, he doesn’t rush, and I am thinking it would be fun to meet again. We’ve not spoken one iota of real business in 10 minutes but shared a few observations and laughter.
I mention this because we have choices about what we say, who we listen to, where we hang out, who we invest time and energy in, and who we wish to be seen as and known as.
Both individuals, conciously or unconciously, have made their decisions.
What is yours? Are you the transaction-first or relationship-first person? Does it really matter?
My point is in different settings, there is no right or wrong answer but in some settings – in my case dealing with wealthy clients who trust very few people and their investments – it is everything!










